


Wet Nightmare

by LdyBastet



Series: Red Pineapple Romance [5]
Category: Bleach
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-22
Updated: 2018-06-22
Packaged: 2019-05-26 21:30:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15009851
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LdyBastet/pseuds/LdyBastet
Summary: During a mission to the Real World, Renji gets into more trouble than he's ever been in, and it isn't even his fault. Careful what you wish for, Renji...





	Wet Nightmare

**Author's Note:**

> This is one of my old Bleach fics that I'm finally putting up on the archive. 
> 
> **Disclaimer:** The characters and universe of Bleach belongs to Kubo Tite. I just borrowed them to explore other concepts and situations with.

"Renji," Byakuya said softly, and Renji couldn't stop the light shiver that ran down his spine in response. Ever since the day he'd walked in on a very half-naked Kuchiki-Taichou in the bath house, he'd been having a hard time focusing on his job whenever Byakuya was close.

"Abarai-Fukutaichou!"

Renji snapped to attention, realising that he'd let himself slip into a daydream again instead of responding. "Yes!" He bowed deeply to apologise for his tardiness and hoped that it would be enough to stave off any reprimands or icy stares.

"We're leaving for the human world in the morning."

"Taichou?" This was the first time Renji had heard anything about this.

"It will take a few days at most, but because we'll probably have to interact with the humans, we'll need to take gigai as well." Byakuya's voice was as smooth and calm as ever, but Renji imagined he could detect a slight note of... Annoyance? Maybe that was a too strong term for it, but there was some kind of tension, Renji thought. Were the daily routines so important to Byakuya that he saw a mission to the real world as causing too much disruption in his schedule? That didn't make sense, Renji thought. No, it had to be something that touched Byakuya directly, something personal...

Then again... The memory of how Byakuya had tried to stare the box of chocolates into oblivion just because it existed came back to Renji. He smiled as he realised that yes, it probably would annoy Byakuya if there was a pebble in his garden that refused to conform to the pattern he'd decided on.

"You're not there to enjoy yourself, Renji."

"No, Taichou," Renji replied, realising that his smile had not gone undetected, even if it had been misinterpreted. "What are we going to do, if you don't mind me asking?"

Byakuya looked at Renji for a moment, then his eyes narrowed. "I'll brief you tomorrow," he said, and when he turned to leave, Renji knew it was no use trying to find out more.

Renji watched his captain walk away. "I'll arrange for the gigai to be ready," he said to Byakuya's back.

~*~

Renji had done some last-minute shopping, a few things that he'd decided were essential for another visit to the real world, like the sunglasses he'd just invested almost six months' salary in. They were sleek and flashy, a smoking hot new model that had just demanded that Renji buy them. If someone asked him - and he knew that both Shuuhei and Ikkaku would - he'd swear that he'd heard them whispering to him... _Buy me! Come on, Abarai! Don't let some loser with more money than you get me... You know you'll regret it if you leave without me. It's only money... Come on, I'm worth so much more. I'll make you look so good!_ And in the end, Renji hadn't been able to resist - not that he'd tried very hard.

He stepped out of the shop, ridiculously happy about his purchase, and came to a very sudden and very definite stop when he ran into someone. Parcels and bags flew and it was all Renji could do to hold onto his prize as he landed on his back.

"Aw, Abarai-kun! You made me drop all my bags!"

"Matsumoto?" Renji realised that there had been a lot more merchandise flying than he could possibly have carried himself.

"Fancy running into you like this," Matsumoto said and laughed as she got to her feet, rubbing her behind in a rather improper manner. "You seem to be in a hurry, Abarai-kun. Is there a fire somewhere, or maybe a sale?"

"Nothing like that. Going on a mission tomorrow."

"Where to?"

"Don't know yet, just that it's in the real world." Renji smiled a little uneasily.

"Aw, that's too bad." Matsumoto winked. "Kuchiki-Taichou is sending you away from us again? Who'll pay for my drinks on Friday then?" 

"Well, Taichou's coming too. He just hasn't said what it's about yet."

"Oh! So... just the two of you going away on a secret mission to a secret place for an undisclosed length of time... I see," she said suggestively. "Well, I'll just have to remind Hisagi-kun that he owes me a bottle of sake too."

Renji hid his embarrassment by gathering up his things. He liked Matsumoto, he really did. She was a good friend, but sometimes, her jokes and teasing struck a nerve. She probably had no idea what kind of lewd thoughts Renji had been entertaining regarding his captain - at least he hoped she didn't - but her words had opened up an avenue of thinking regarding this mission that Renji had successfully kept away from. Until now.

He found his soul dispenser under one of Matsumoto's bags of underwear, and refilled it with the Soul Candy that had been scattered during his collision with Matsumoto. 

"They still haven't fixed that on these new models," Matsumoto complained, waving her own around. "Sometimes when I drop mine, the pills fall out too. I took it in today to see if they could adjust it."

Renji shrugged. "They probably don't think it's that important." He handed the bag from Rove & Ringerie to her with a grin. "I think this is yours. I never shop there."

"Well, maybe you should. They have some nice thongs there..." 

"No thank you. I prefer my fundoshi."

"You're such a traditionalist."

"Nothing wrong with traditions," Renji replied. "And fundoshi are comfortable." He tried very hard not to think about the fact that he knew that Byakuya preferred them as well.

"Mm, let me know more about your underwear, Abarai-kun," Matsumoto purred seductively and stepped very, very close to Renji.

Renji blushed and kept his gaze straight ahead. "I should get ready for the trip. I'm sorry. I'll buy you that drink when I get back."

Matsumoto made a show of pouting and looking disappointed, but then she laughed and did a little pirouette with her bags in her hands. "See you later then. Be careful out there!"

Renji sighed. He'd completely forgotten the bet he'd lost to her, and now he didn't have money left to buy _himself_ a drink, even. He checked the bag with his sunglasses and sighed again, this time out of relief when he saw that they were unharmed.

~*~

"So, Taichou, where are we going?" Renji asked. He kept his eyes on the Hell Butterfly in front of him and tried to keep up with Byakuya's stride through the gate.

"Karakura Town."

Renji grinned. "Okay." That meant he could pay Rukia a visit, even if that meant he'd have to spend time with Kurosaki as well. The kid was okay, he guessed, but so annoying at times! Like when he ate the chocolate Renji had given to Byakuya... even if that had turned out all right. He gave Byakuya's back a questioning glance. Something wasn't quite as it should be. Byakuya hadn't actually said anything about the whole issue with the break-in at the office for a while. Did that mean that Byakuya had given up on finding out who the chocolate was from? Or did he bring Renji along to the scene of the crime, in a manner of speaking? After all, he had found out that it had been bought in Karakura.

When they stepped through the door into the real world, Renji wasn't smiling anymore.

"Um, so, what are we doing here, Taichou?" He glanced around to see if he recognised the rather nondescript street. "You said you'd brief me when we arrived."

"Yamamoto-Soutaichou wants us to investigate what Kurosaki is actually doing as a substitute Shingami. He's never really trusted him, and over time, there has been some rather blatant misconduct and shows of disrespect."

Renji nodded silently.

"He's also concerned about the influence Kurosaki may have or have already had on certain members of the Gotei 13." Byakuya looked up the street, but to Renji, he could just as well have given him a piercing look. "There are a few Shinigami who's had quite a bit of contact with him."

"And I'm one of them," Renji said quietly.

"So is Rukia."

Renji looked at Byakuya. "Rukia? You don't think she's been _influenced_ by Ichigo? She takes her job seriously and she's very dedicated to her Division and her mission!"

"She's also very dedicated to Kurosaki," Byakuya pointed out.

"You're afraid she'll want to marry him, or something, Taichou?" Renji asked, suspecting that there was something a little more personal behind Byakuya's words.

"That would be extremely unfortunate."

"Why? Because he's only a substitute Shinigami?"

"Kurosaki Ichigo is not right for her, and he's also alive."

"What?" Renji stopped walking and stared at Byakuya. "Alive? Of course he's alive. You'd rather she married a dead guy?"

Byakuya turned and gave Renji a long look. "This is one reason I think you have spent too much time in Kurosaki's company. You're thinking of him as one of us, a Shinigami. She's not a living human, so how could she marry one?" Byakuya asked, sounding slightly annoyed. "You are, in fact, a 'dead guy' too, Abarai Renji."

Renji was quiet while they continued down the street. Byakuya's words had pulled up some old memories, and he didn't like thinking about those times. The time before he met Rukia, and the time when he'd just arrived to Soul Society, when he'd just died. They were such confused memories. But then a thought struck him.

"Taichou... In noble families, there are bloodlines."

Byakuya nodded. 

"How does that work? I mean, were you actually born into the Kuchiki family?"

"Of course."

Renji had a hard time wrapping his mind around that concept. "But no one in Soul Society is actually 'alive'. You were born into being dead?"

"Yes. If you want to put it that way."

"Doesn't it bother you?" Renji asked.

"No."

"But it makes no sense, Taichou," Renji insisted.

"In this world, there are many things that make no sense, yet still they are and exist, without the need for us to understand."

"Confucius?"

"My grandfather."

"Oh." Renji felt silly. "Where are we going now?" he asked after a few moments, trying to change the subject.

"To find somewhere to stay," Byakuya replied. "I don't know where you usually sleep when you're here."

"At Urahara's." Renji could just imagine the tension if they both invaded Urahara's shop and home. Uruhara would probably find it amusing, but Renji doubted that Byakuya would enjoy it. "I don't think they'll mind if we drop by..."

"I'll get a hotel room," Byakuya said, and Renji nodded. It was probably the best solution.

~*~

They'd spent two days investigating Kurosaki Ichigo's character and conduct. Byakuya had wanted to talk to the elderly lady living next door to the Kurosaki's to find out what she thought of the boy, and had also managed to get Ichigo's teachers to let him see his grades. When Renji'd asked about them, Byakuya had just said that they were actually better than he'd thought.

"So, he's still doing well in school, despite doing Shinigami work too," Renji mused aloud. He'd always thought Ichigo was the kind of guy who wasn't interested in school.

"Apparently."

Renji wondered if that was disappointment he heard in Byakuya's voice. "He's also quick to come to someone's rescue, and helps old ladies with their grocery bags. And he doesn't hesitate to put his life on the line when a Hollow appears," Renji added.

"Yes."

"Sounds to me as if he's a rather decent guy and not giving Shinigami such a bad reputation. He's doing some good stuff out there, and I kinda doubt that he's all that destructive to... what was it Yamamoto-Soutaichou called it?"

"The Gotei 13 rules and morale. The essence of what it is to be a Shinigami."

"Yeah. That." Renji grinned and shoved his hands into his jeans pockets, feeling surprisingly relieved that they hadn't found any dirt on Ichigo, no irresponsibility or particularly bad habits. 

Their cell phones beeped at the same time and Renji pulled his up. "A Hollow on the east side of town."

"Let Kurosaki take care of it," Byakuya said and continued walking.

The phones beeped again and now Byakuya took his out as well. "Another one on the west side." 

Beep. Beep.

"Shit," Renji said. "Two more! He can't be in several places at the same time!"

Byakuya looked around. They were in a rather abandoned part of the park. He took his soul dispenser out of his pocket and swallowed one of the pills, and Renji did the same.

"Stay hidden here!" Byakuya ordered the artificial souls now in charge of their gigai, and then he and Renji were off in different directions.

~*~

Renji had done a pretty quick slice-and-dice job of the Hollow, he thought, but of course he hadn't been any faster than Byakuya. They touched down practically at the same time after flash-stepping back to the park. Byakuya, with no sign of having exerted himself - not out of breath, not even a single strand of hair out of place - had his scarf draped over his shoulders as perfectly as ever. Typical, Renji thought. Dirt just didn't stick to that man. It probably didn't dare to. Renji grinned.

"I take it it went well," Byakuya commented.

"Yes, Taichou. Piece of cake." 

Byakuya nodded and they went to find their gigai. 

Renji rounded the bushes and then stopped in his tracks, staring in horror at the sight that met him and wishing that the earth would crack open and swallow him up - pretty much just like his gigai was doing to Byakuya's... "Oh no," he whispered, a cold weight like a ten ton block of ice settling in his stomach. This was a nightmare, that was the only explanation...

Byakuya's gigai had his trousers open and Renji's gigai was kneeling in front of it, hands on the back of Byakuya's thighs. There was no doubt in Renji's mind what those head movements meant, and together with the wet, sucking noises... Byakuya made no sound beside him, but Renji knew he'd been only a step behind him and was witnessing exactly the same scene. "Oh god." Renji swallowed, feeling the heat rise on his cheeks. He was in so much trouble now!

Renji rushed forward and pulled his gigai back, causing Byakuya's cock to slide free from its mouth with a wet plop. "What the fuck are you doing?" he growled, pulling his gigai to its feet by the front of its shirt. "What the..? Fuck!"

The replacement soul pouted and canted its head to the side. "Aww, but he's such a hottie! Just perfect for some cuddling." 

Renji stared. Was that an attempt to flutter his eyelashes he just saw? He had no idea what the hell was going on, but something was very, very wrong. His artificial souls had never behaved like this before. "It's no excuse to molest him!" he yelled and pushed his gigai away from himself and away from Byakuya's gigai. He turned to Byakuya and knelt before him. 

"I'm very sorry, Kuchiki-Taichou. I-- I don't know how this happened, but..." Renji took a deep breath, blushing furiously. He bowed as deeply as he could, pressing his forehead to the ground in front of Byakuya's feet. "I take full responsibility and... I-- Please forgive me, Taichou. I will accept whatever punishment you see fit."

Byakuya was silent, and Renji didn't dare move, much less look up at him. He was trembling inside, and every second was an agonisingly slow step toward his doom.

"Perhaps you should constrain your gigai," Byakuya said finally, and Renji threw a look over his shoulder.

While Renji had tried to apologise, his gigai had quietly edged closer to Byakuya's gigai again. From this position, Renji got an unfortunately good look at what his gigai was coveting, because for some reason, Byakuya's gigai hadn't yet zipped up its trousers and it was glowering at Renji and Byakuya.

Renji closed his eyes tightly. "Stay away from him," he growled. Why hadn't Byakuya ordered his replacement soul to get its clothes in order? This was something Renji knew he could never unsee: the image of a pale, elegant curve flanked by black fabric was forever burned onto the screen of his mind.

"Let's put an end to this behaviour," Byakuya said quietly. "Return to your gigai now. This is not the place to discuss this."

Renji nodded. He preferred to be chastised and punished a little more privately. He knew _ordinary_ people couldn't see him, but it was enough to know that in this town, there were those who had enough spiritual power to do so, and with the luck he'd had today he didn't want to risk it.

He dove back into his gigai and had to stifle a whimper. The arousal that hit him as he settled back into it was something he hadn't been prepared for. Renji swallowed hard, trying to get his frazzled nerves under control, and realised that he could taste Byakuya on his tongue: a light, lingering taste of cock. It did not make it any easier.

Renji walked half a step behind Byakuya all the way back to the hotel. This was so fucked up, he thought. In a way, it was everything he'd dreamed about, sucking Byakuya off, but the manner in which his wet dream had come true was nothing but a nightmare. The physical effects of having been halfway through a blowjob refused to wear off, getting stronger instead, spurred on by snapshots from fantasies Renji'd had about Byakuya while masturbating. It was maddening, the way his brain kept feeding the flames, and by the time they took the elevator up to Byakuya's floor, Renji's cock was throbbing.

"Excuse me," Renji croaked as soon as they were inside the room. He fled to the bathroom and closed and locked the door behind him with shaking hands. He'd never been so aroused in his entire life, he thought. 

Quickly, he pulled down his trousers and, leaning back against the door, closed his hand around his cock. It didn't take very long before he exploded in an orgasm, fierce enough to make the edges of his vision black. "Fuck," he whispered to himself, his knees threatening to give out on him. 

He took a deep breath and managed to get over to the sink to clean himself up. When he'd washed off and buttoned his trousers, he splashed some cold water into his face. This was it, Renji thought. Byakuya was on the other side of that door, and he was probably contemplating what to do with Renji... what punishment that would be enough to make up for the humiliation he'd caused his captain. Now that the arousal was gone, the cold fear was back in full force, and Renji felt sick.

Renji leaned with both hands on the sink and slowly raised his head to look at his reflection in the mirror. "You're dead, Renji," he said to himself. "He didn't show it, but he must be furious at what happened. When you get out... he'll kill you."

For a moment, Renji contemplated not opening the door, but what good were doors if Byakuya decided to leave his gigai and just step into the bathroom in his spirit form? There was no way Renji could hide, and drawing it out would only make things worse, if they could be.

His mind made up, Renji opened the door and stepped out from the relative safety of the bathroom, not knowing what unimaginable fate he was facing. Would Byakuya kill him then and there? Would he use Senbonzakura? Perhaps he didn't want to tarnish his zanpakutou by killing Renji with it... Renji studied the carpet in front of his feet.

"Taichou..." he whispered, then faltered. He had no defense, no explanation for what had happened, and nothing he said would make a difference anyway.

"You will return here tomorrow morning," Byakuya said calmly, and Renji looked up. Those were not the words he'd expected. Byakuya should be angry, having that icy cold tone in his voice that really meant he was furious. He should be demanding that Renji commit seppuku or something, inform him that he should expect to be arrested and held in a cell until his execution... But there Byakuya was, sitting on the sofa, sipping tea.

Tea. If Byakuya was going to drink anything now, Renji would have thought it would be sake, wine, whisky, something with alcohol. Not tea. Renji knew he needed a stiff drink, at least.

Perhaps Byakuya sensed Renji's confusion, because he continued. "We'll leave our gigai here in the room, instead of using those replacement souls, and we'll hang up the do not disturb sign so no one finds them and thinks we're dead."

Renji nodded mutely. When Byakuya poured himself another cup, Renji realised he'd been dismissed and left the room on legs that barely obeyed him.

Somehow, he'd avoided death. Byakuya had spared him. For now. But Renji was certain that his punishment would come, the question was only when. Byakuya couldn't turn a blind eye to something like this. His integrity, his dignity, tainted by Renji's gigai... Renji was a dead man, and he was about to be even more dead; it was just that he hadn't been killed yet.


End file.
